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IN THIS ISSUE

• Zvonko Springer is still hunting animals with cameras
• Tom Kyle forwards a story about a farming dilemma
• Pat Moore sends a poem about the glories of winter
• Dick Monaghan shares some observations on getting older
• Catherine Green explains the value of a prescription
• Bruce Galway, Carol Hansen, and Dick Monaghan suggest sites

Zvonko Springer describes their adventures at the crater´s rim in their

FIRST KENYAN SAFARI

After booking into the Crater Lodge, the serviceman brought live coals and made fire in the open hearth in our room. He told us where we could get more firewood as it would get rather cold in the night. After we dressed in warmer clothing, there was enough light to go for a short drive, so we drove along the East Rim Road. The crater floor was already in shade at 5:30. After about 10km we came to the outlook point next to a small pyramid that was the tomb of Professor Grzimek´s son.

Above the west crater edge we could recognize the extinct volcanoes of Oldonyo Olmoti, Embakat that had a lake, and Lolmalasin, the highest. We continued along a dry path with many curves until we reached Baumann´s Point. (Baumann was a German who first brought livestock into the Ngorongoro crater.) It was high time to return because the car lights were not in order, and I heard a strange noise coming from underneath the front end now and then. At last we got to the lodge, crawling at 15km/h in the dim light beam. Our friends had arrived not too long before and were in the process of putting up their tent. After friendly greetings and exchanging stories of our recent travel experiences, it was time for dinner.

The dining room and the bar were in one building, constructed in the same way as the guest houses. In the middle stood a large fireplace, with big logs to heat the whole room. Its chimney was in the hollow column built of local rock that supported the conical roof of the building. It was cozy inside and the nicely-arranged tables in the dining section were inviting. The food was excellent and we enjoyed the perfect service. This place was the best we had visited up until then - or were we just hungry?

We went straight to our room after dinner and invited our friends to come to our room to have warm baths. Vesna had a small room for herself, linked by a corridor to our larger room, with the bathroom available to both. It was not long before Vesna was deeply asleep. At 8:45 our friends arrived and Christa went to the bathroom to have her bath first.

Gerhard was telling the tale with many details of how they got from Olduvai up to the crater. I was getting nervous when Christa did not come out of the bathroom for a long time. Then Ljiljana heard a dull thud from the bathroom, and knocked on the door. There was no answer, so she opened the door and found Christa lying unconscious on the floor. Together we lifted her and carried her out of the bathroom, put her on the bed and covered her with a blanket. The fresh air from an open window cooled the room instantly, but Christa remained unconscious. She was tired and had collapsed from the heat in the bathroom. She breathed faintly and her pulse was weak, so Ljiljana was slapping her gently. In the meantime, I pulled her hands up and down and massaged her feet to bring her back.

All the time I was wondering what kind of the medicine would stimulate her heart and breathing. At last, Christa opened her eyes and looked confused by what was going on around her. She took a few gulps of coffee and nip of rum that Gerhard brought, but it did not help much as she complained about pains in her chest. Then I remembered my tablets of ASMAC that I took for my asthma attacks at that time. I gave her half a tablet that really worked wonders, as within half an hour Christa was breathing normally and colour had returned to her cheeks. Soon she became fully aware and dressed in her training suit. She bundled in blankets and went to sleep in a field-bed that Gerhard brought to our room. Then he went to sleep in their tent, also exhausted from vainly trying to find some medical help at the concierge or an empty room for his sister. Ljiljana brought in more firewood as a slightly-open window made it quite chilly inside. At last we got to bed at nearly midnight, much later than our recent routine.

Next morning started dull and cloudy, and the lack of sleep made us bad tempered until an elephant walked in front of our verandah. This brought back our wits and I urged all to get breakfast as fast as possible. I booked a Landrover for an all-day ride with lunch included for 8:00 o´clock to take us down to the crater floor. The driver-guide suggested an early start, so we left the lodge at 8:20 without the Saches, who were regrettably late.

We followed the West Rim road we had came in on the day before, passed Lerai village, and soon got to the Oldonyo Seneto drop. This was the steepest path I ever thought of driving as we made 600m of descent in 20 minutes. We had to hold hard to our seats so we would not drop out of the car, but when we reached the floor, we became aware of the crater´s great size. Its diameter was 16km and its walls height varied between 400m and 800m in some places. The tour started along the right track, bypassing a boma (unpopulated and now used for movies) and soon passed through the Lerai Forest.

On the way out of the forest, we passed by a few elephants (mother with young ones only), proceeding towards the dried-out hippo pool to Magad Lake. The lake water was at a low level of about 10m, whereas it went up to 25m during the flood period. A group of nine hippos was basking inside the lake, but we could not get too close to them due to mud. However, there were large herds grazing nearby, mostly gnus, zebras, hartebeests, all kind of gazelles, and impalas in hundreds. Our Landrover did not bother them at all, and gnus ran around just for fun.

We were five in the car that had a hard roof with two large openings so we could take pictures out of them by standing on the seat. With time, it became "unexciting" driving amid dozens of various kinds of herds, with here and there a few giraffes. Then the driver said, "In front is a rhino!"

The crater edge rimmed by clouds with blue skies above on that beautiful morning could be the setting for the most exciting event of our safari, I thought. The white dots on the rim marked the lodge houses, and a grey dot some 200m away in opposite direction, the rhino. The driver approached the resting monster to within about 30m and stopped, switching off the engine. The animal did not like that and got up slowly and moved in the opposite direction. The driver switched on the engine and started to pursue the rhino, keeping at a of distance of 30m. Suddenly the rhino turned aggressively towards the car, closing in fast. Ljiljana and Vesna shouted: "Take pictures!" The animal got so close that all I could see was his rear with its lifted tail. The animal was trying to attack the car, which moved in circles for a while until the rhino gave up, turned away, and rushed back towards the lake. For the rhino the chase was over! Our driver explained that driving in circles and decreasing the radius made the rhino tired. With time, it would certainly give up running after the car. Well, that was good to know, yet one should have a 4-wheel-drive car on a flat and firm surface.

The driver climbed a small hill in the crater named Oldonyo Osilale. From it we had a perfect view over dry Lake Magadi and the grassy or bushy land all around it. It was still cool and we kept our leather jackets on for a while. We drove down to follow the bank of the Oljoronyuki River. The driver made a lot of noise with the engine, explaining that he was looking for lions in the thick brush that was 1.5m high. The car went easily through these growths that reached over the engine bonnet, leaving no trace of its passage. On the Upper Drift path we passed through some smaller clearings, in one of which two mighty lions appeared. We had never seen such strong majestic lions. Their almost-black manes and their fur colour blended into the surrounding. The lions walked fast, looking back at us angrily as if saying, "Leave us in peace. We have something important to do!" Then they parted, so the driver followed one at short distance for a while until both vanished in the bush.

To be continued.

Tom Kyle forwards this story of one of the

QUANDARIES IN FARMING

The only cow in a small town in Scotland stopped giving milk. The town´s folk decided to buy a new animal and on checking, found they could buy a cow cheaper in Wales.

They brought the cow from Wales and it was wonderful: produced lots of milk every day and everyone was happy.

They bought a bull to mate with the cow to get more cows, so they´d never have to worry about their milk supply again.

After they put the bull in the pasture with the cow, the farmer discovered that when the bull tried to mount the cow ... the cow would move away.

No matter what approach the bull tried, the cow would move away from the bull and he was never able to do the deed.

The people were very upset and decided to go the vet, who was very wise, tell him what was happening and ask his advice.

"Whenever the bull tries to mount our cow, she moves away.

"If he approaches from the back, she moves forward; if from the front, she backs off; if from one side, she moves to the other side."

The vet rubbed his chin thoughtfully and pondered this, then he asked, "Did you by chance, buy this cow in Wales ?"

The people were dumbfounded, since no one had ever mentioned that they had brought the cow from Wales.

"You are truly a wise vet," they said. "How did you know we got the cow from Wales?"

The vet answered with a distant look in his eye:

"Well, you see - my wife is from Wales!"

Pat Moore sends this poem which I am publishing now, before the rest of the continent catches up to the wet coast:

WINTER PORTRAIT

There´s a feathery blanket on the ground;
The north wind is waltzing across the snow.
Shivering pine trees have become lacy white;
Broken limbs are falling to the earth below.
Cardinal feathers are now a white-tipped red
After flitting furiously in the fresh-fallen snow,
The fluffy canopy on the hard -frozen ground
Blends with tea-rose skies, creating a glow.

The footsteps of the walkers are soon hidden
As winter snow comes swirling down.
While the flowers sleep under a cover of white,
A lovely winter day excites a sleepy town.
Darkness descends and silver moonbeams fall
On evergreens now weighed down with white;
Light flickers through frosted windowpanes;
Chimney smoke billows upward in the night.
The curtains are then swiftly drawn aside;
Overhead lights reflect on the luster below.
Shadows fall lightly across icy ground,
Creating a path of silver in the snow.

ED. NOTE: I really hate to mention this, but I saw miniature tulips in bloom at the library today.

Dick Monaghan writes: I was going to highlight the ones I recognized ... and finally gave up; it was everything!

OBSERVATIONS ON GROWING OLD

01. It´s harder to tell navy from black.

02. Everything old is new again, but if you wore it before, you´re too old to wear it the second time around.

03. Your kids are becoming like you - and you don´t like them, but your grandchildren are perfect!

04. Yellow becomes your big colour - your eyeballs, your skin, your teeth, and your underwear.

05. Going out is good; coming home is even better!

06. When people say you look "Great", they add, "for your age!"

07. When you needed the discount, you paid full price. Now you get discounts on everything - movies, hotels, flights.

08. You forget names, but it´s OK because other people forgot they even knew you.

09. The last two outfits you wore had spots on them.

10. You ask your spouse or friend how your outfit looks and they tell you the truth.

11. The five pounds you wanted to lose are now 15 and you have a better chance of losing your keys than the 15 pounds.

12. You realize you´re never going to be really good at anything - especially golf.

13. Your spouse is counting on you to remember things you don´t remember.

14. The things you cared to do, you now don´t care to do, but you care that you don´t care to do them anymore.

15. Your spouse sleeps better on a lounge chair with the TV blaring than in bed. It´s called "pre-sleep".

16. Remember when your mother said, "Wear clean underwear in case you GET in an accident"? Now you bring clean underwear in case you HAVE an accident.

17. You used to say, "I hope my kids GET married." Now it´s, "I hope they STAY married!"

18. The best place to have a conversation with your spouse is in the bathroom - you have his/her full attention.

19. You miss the days when everything worked with just an "ON" and "OFF" switch; when GOOGLE, iPod, email, and modem were unheard of; and when a mouse was something that made you climb on a table.

20. You use more four-letter words - "What?"..."When?"

21. Now that you can afford expensive jewelry, it´s not safe to wear it anywhere.

22. Your spouse has a night out with the guys/gals but he/she is home by 9:00 p.m.; next week it will be 8:30 p.m.

23. You read 100 pages into a book before you realize you´ve already read it before.

24. You notice everything they sell in clothing stores is "tight and sleeveless" for women and "tight and below the butt" for men.

25. You never heard of any of the people in People Magazine.

26. Your concealer doesn´t conceal, your lipstick bleeds, your mascara clumps, and your eyebrows are disappearing.

27. You don´t have hair under your arms and very little on your legs, but your chin needs to be plucked daily.

28. What used to be freckles are now liver spots.

29. Everybody whispers.

30. Now that your spouse has retired, you´d give anything if he/she would find a job.

31. You have three sizes of clothes in your closet, two of which you will never wear again.

32. But old is good in some things - old songs, old movies, and best of all - old friends!

Catherine Green sends this one about

DIVORCE VS MURDER

A nice, calm and respectable lady went into the pharmacy, walked up to the pharmacist, looked straight into his eyes, and said, "I would like to buy some cyanide."

The pharmacist asked, "Why in the world do you need cyanide?"

The lady replied, "I need it to poison my husband."

The pharmacist´s eyes got big and he explained, "Lord have mercy! I can´t give you cyanide to kill your husband! That´s against the law? I´ll lose my licence! They´ll throw both of us in jail! All kinds of bad things will happen. Absolutely not! You CANNOT have any cyanide!"

The lady reached into her purse and pulled out a picture of her husband in bed with the pharmacist´s wife.

The pharmacist looked at the picture and replied, "You didn´t tell me you had a prescription."

SUGGESTED SITES

Bruce Galway sends the site for a time-lapse video of Yonge Street:

Carol Hansen forwards this one of a 911 call from five-year-old Savannah:

Dick Monaghan sends the URLs for the nominated short animated movies you never get to see:

"French Roast" Fabrice O. Joubert

"Granny O´Grimm´s Sleeping Beauty" Nicky Phelan and Darragh O´Connell

"The Lady and the Reaper (La Dama y la Muerte)" Javier Recio Gracia

ED. NOTE: There were two more animated movies but they were removed from YouTube due to copyright claims.

From the City Farmer newsletter, here is the URL for a video of Jamie Oliver, a TED prize winner, makes the case for an all-out assault on our ignorance of food: